What-Ifs of My Salvation

Sometimes I think about how glad I am that I accepted Christ when I did, as a child. God showed His love for me, drawing me to Him waaaaay back then. He gave me the very faith it takes to reach out for the grace He extends.

As an adult, I’m skeptical and suspicious. I sometimes live hardened. So I wonder, would my heart ever be softened to Him, if I wasn’t saved yet today?

But then I think about Psalm 139.

You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,

as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.

You saw me before I was born.

Every day of my life was recorded in your book.

Every moment was laid out

Before a single day had passed.

(Verses 15-16, NLT)

The Holy Spirit moved me to accept the Son at a young age – and He knew I would choose to come to Him.

Sometimes I wonder if I was born in the days of Noah, or in the days of Moses, or Nehemiah, would I have followed the one true God, and looked forward to the Messiah? If I had lived during the days Jesus lived fully God, fully man, and walked on the dusty roads of Israel, and preached in the temple, would I have fallen in love with Him as my Lord?

But He called me, and showed Himself to me, so how could I turn from that love, regardless of His timing in creating me? I remember the lessons God has taught me. How many times have I studied Old Testament books, and delighted in seeing God as Savior long before Jesus came down for us? I can’t count the beautiful, holy-love revealing times.

I saw the remnants of His people and His plan protected time and again through studies of Israel and the Minor Prophets in Bible Studies Fellowship, and in my studies in solitude of Genesis, Exodus, Joshua, Ruth and more. And I know, I just know, that no matter when or where He put me on this earth, I would belong to Him.

Even if I lived in the days when I would have been drawing water from a well in a town in the ancient Middle East, I can trust Him that He would have given me the gift of faith and salvation through grace. Even through a time of arranged marriages and bloody animal sacrifices at a temple, He planned for me to be His. God is the Savior, eternally, not simply beginning at the Cross.

Sometimes I think dwelling on the what-ifs of my salvation and of when God gave me life, is silliness. Far-fetched. Reality dictates, after all. God created me in the 20^th Century.

God settled the salvation part already, in this lifetime that he really did give me. That’s not a dreamed up scenario. He planned in advance good works for me to do. He truly took and uses difficult, sad events in my life for good, and will in the years to come. I see His new mercies every morning. He blesses me immeasurably each day. So, why dwell on what-ifs?

My thoughts return there, because this spiritual imagination and these heart-thoughts, increase my gratitude. Through the humility developed picturing different scenarios in my life, I appreciate my salvation more. I credit my God more. I let Father, Son and Holy Spirit work more deeply within me. I am honored and thankful to belong to the Almighty.

Photo: Public Domain, Cross on Mount Royal, Montreal, Canada

©Helene Bergren. All Rights Reserved.